Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Land of the Lost Chaka vs. Chaka Khan

After the hair debacle that was American Idol's Paula Abdul in a recent episode, comparisons were made to a not-so-beloved Saturday morning character from the 70s. Chaka from the weird world of Sid and Marty Krofft's Land of the Lost brandished a similar do in both color and sweep to the woman who sits between Simon and that Dawg Randy.
Upon further Internet research, I discovered a debate raging about similarities between Madame Abdul and the tallest Star Wars character, Chewbacca.

I'm no Star Wars geek. I saw the original three movies in the theater. I might have watched Star Wars once again on USA network a hundred years ago, so I'll dismiss the Chewbacca debate and return to something I know much, much more about - Chaka - friend to Will, Holly and Marshall; enemy of the Sleestak.

But once you move the diminutive hirsute cromagnon imp to the forefront, leaving Chewie in the comet dust, you have to bring on his next opponent.
I say let the diva Chaka Khan enter the Astro Lounge ring.

Sid & Marty's Chaka vs. Chaka Khan

* Chaka - Land of theLost theme song for Season 1 and 2:
"Marshall, Will, and Holly, on a routine expedition,
Met the greatest earthquake ever known.
High on the rapids, it struck their tiny raft.
And plunged them down a thousand feet below
To the Land of the Lost."
* Chaka Khan - Covered Prince lyrics and got cameos from Stevie Wonder and Melle Mel and worked with Ray Charles
* Advantage - push (Prince, for crying out loud, yet the TV theme song brings to mind images of that tiny yellow raft going over the waterfall)

* Chaka - Landof the Lost lasted three seasons (1974-77 original episodes) and then reruns aired for two years (1985-87).
* Chaka Khan - her first release with the group Rufus came in 1973, won a Grammy in 1984 and 1990, released a best of CD in 2005.
* Advantage - Chaka Khan

* Chaka - joined with the humans and squared off on a weekly basis against evil Sleestaks
* Chaka Khan - Sang at 2000 Republican presidential convention
* Advantage - Chaka

* Chaka - head to toe dry hairball. Makes Bigfoot look like he just got a Brazilian bikini wax.No split ends the only saving grace
* Chaka Khan - luxurious locks in abundance, yet none growing out of her forehead or palms.
*Advantage - Chaka Khan

* Chaka - was nearly part of a sampler platter meal for hungry stop-motion dinosaurs on every episode
* Chaka Khan - her song "Through the Fire" was sampled by Kanye West
* Advantage - Chaka Khan

So, by a 3-1 margin, Chaka Khan advances to our next Astro Lounge round, leaving the wee Planet of the Apes reject back in time with Will, Holly and Marshall.

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